The grass is rarely greener on the other side – with or without a chronic disease

We’ve all been there, working our tails off to look good, feel good, make money, be successful and have it all.  Meanwhile for Joe Shmoe or Nancy Shmancy, everything seems to come soo easy.  Perfect hair, perfect body, perfect tan, they get their work done quickly, have a beautiful home, and exercise exorbitant amounts daily to maintain that flawless physique.  They travel the world, eat fine foods, enjoy wine, even ice cream and rarely get sick.

It’s so simple to look at people like that and ASSume they have it all.  But you know what they say… making ASSumptions makes an A?! out of you and me. So stop it already!

We’ve all got crap to deal with. Some may have a little more than others but when it’s all said and done – we’ve all got a cross to bear. The real question is what are you going to DO about it?

Enter my cross: my disease.  Lupus has certainly kicked the snot out of me these past years.  It’s transformed me from someone who used to be more positive, more energetic, more social, and more active to someone who can be outright negative and even bitter at times, who constantly has to pace herself, avoids crowds, and treasures down time.  This isn’t because I’ve allowed lupus to define me — it’s because I’ve had to adjust my life significantly out of necessity… and who really likes being forced to do something?

It was during this therapeutic fast to enhance my health, when I had WAAY too much couch time, that my reality unraveled and began to bore its ugly face.  That’s usually when it happens isn’t it?  When we’re tired, hurting… no make that suffering, and at the end of our rope.  Well that was me, plus one too many commercials with beautiful peppy people eating cheesy burgers with no-doubt impeccable health flashing before me on the T.V. screen.

Before long I was cursing my disease, my symptoms and the fact that despite how well I’ve taken care of myself through the years – I have to endure such pain.  “It just isn’t fair!” were my exact words.

You see, when I start making comparisons against other people, it’s just no good. When I dwell on what a healthy life I’ve lived: how much I exercised, how I never smoked, rarely drank, ate tons of fruit (eh, not so much veggies but lots of salad), consumed a healthy diet (according to American standards), maintained a healthy weight, got plenty of sleep, etc.., etc… and then compare that to people who abuse the heck out of their poor worn bodies, yet have their health intact: no symptoms, no disease, no pills, no fatigue — that’s when I become angry.  That’s when I think, or even say “it just isn’t fair.”

But the truth is, life isn’t fair.  We’ve all got our burdens.  Whether it’s health issues, financial struggles, marital strife, or an addiction of some sort… it ain’t easy.  Life isn’t full of roses and it certainly doesn’t promise us anything, but what it does do is teach us lessons.  Life lessons.

In fact, I’ve learned more from my lupus than I learned in all of the years of my schooling.  I’ve learned the importance of nourishing my body with high nutrient produce, whole plant foods, and anti-inflammatory ingredients.  I’ve learned how tough life is, but how sweeet it can be.  I’ve learned to value often overlooked acts (like eating!) and to never take my health for granted. These are the lessons that make it all worthwhile.  They turn the pain into gain.

So when I see peers doing things that my husband and I have missed out on, or beautiful babes that appear to have it all — I’ve learned to count my blessings and to thank my lucky stars.  Because there’s always someone who is worse off, in more need, or in a more dire situation.

Hang tight my friends and be content with your own good fortune, cuz the grass is rarely greener on the other side.

We’ve all got our challenges. What’s yours and how do you deal with it? What keeps you going?

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